Losing Grip

Its hurting. Everything hurts. Everything hurts.. Everything hurts.. Everything.

My chest.. My chest…
I am suffocating. I can’t breathe. My lungs are collapsing or bursting. I do not know but it feels like a freaking big stone sitting on top of me. It hurts…
Everything hurts.

Aaaah! My heart..My heart is breaking into bazillion pieces and every piece is cutting through my chest. It hurts.. Everything hurts.

My eyes… My eyes…
Tears are making my eyes blurry. I cannot see. I can’t stop them from falling down my cheek that is flushed so red with embarrassment of getting weak. A sob escapes my throat. It hurts..
Everything hurts.

My legs.. My legs…
I cannot stand. My legs are turning into jelly. I am losing grip from reality. Oh! do not drag me down to the floor. I am shaking and sobbing. It hurts..
Everything hurts.

My mind… My mind
My brain will burst! I am a ticking time bomb. It is taking me to the highest building and telling me to jump. And fall. And die. Why!
It hurts..
Everything hurts.

How do I make this pain stop? My eyes are filled with tears and my heart is bleeding. My legs have no longer the strength to carry me ahead and my chest is pounding. My soul is howling. The shattering of my heart is deafening my ears. And my brain is telling me to jump.

Will the death of this body make the pain of my soul go numb?

It’s hurting. Everything hurts. Everything hurts.. Everything hurts.. Everything.

And right now all I want is an end to this pain. Because this hurting is making me insane. So turn off the lights. Let me sob on my pillow and wet it with my tears. Let me drown in this sorrow. Let me cry myself to sleep.
Sing me a lullaby. Because I am losing grip.

♡ XOXO ♡