Stand in my shoes….

Hi Honey,

I am sorry for whatever happened in the past but i never intended to break your heart. But i really do not want to discuss all that anymore.

I want a new beginning for my life.

I am too depressed and tired of my life .And i really want to be back as the person i was when you met me for the first time.

I want you to help me in that because the day i will be the same strong person again with loads of attitude i will no more need an anti-depression pill.

I want to be alone but i want you to be in my life as well.

I want you to understand things that i am going through everyday..things that i have been going through since many years..things that i cannot explain and share it with anyone…i can only cry and let out my pain….that is the only way. I have been dying every moment, I am dying every day.

I have been fighting me own self with the every ticking of the clock.

I don’t have much friends in my life .I have a very small amount of people in my life whom i can call good friends or best friends. With whom i feel good and comfortable. I really care for them and they have a special place in my life.

I cannot lose them. But that does not mean that you or my family is not important.

Each one of you have a special place in my life and heart. And i cannot bear to lose you or any of my friend or my family.

I love you a lot and cannot live without you but i want to learn to be alone for some time. I want to figure out what i want to do in life…it’s not only about our relationship’s about my life …my aim in life..and what i want to do. I am confused and this is the only way i can figure it out i guess. But for that i need you support.

I want you to let me be alone but be by my side at the same time so that you can hold me back if i ever slip.

“Believe me, I know sometimes I am not the easiest person to be around. I love when you cook breakfast or dinner for me! I imagine us and kids and grand kids and we will them the story of how we met. And then they’ll (hopefully) be inspired by it.I think about all the things that we had to go through to be together and how far we’ve gotten.
I think about all the great places we’ve been together. 
I feel like my life just started and I can’t wait for all the years we have ahead of us.”

I am just trying to find ways and words to make you understand what i want and the pain that i go through. I hope you just try it one time at least…Just stand in my shoes and experience the helplessness that i feel every moment.

Please do not misinterpret me..please do not try to think anything else….Just listen to what i am trying to tell you ……without thinking any other thing….

I am not selfish, I am not a betrayer..i am just a kid ….& i am just confused.I hope you understand me …stand in my shoes….and do not judge me .

I love you

© Fiona Crystal *All rights reserved. Material not to be copied or distributed without permission